Thursday, November 16, 2006

Piss Off, Chris Spielman

Okay, so we weren’t saying a whole lot about this weekend’s Ohio State-Michigan tilt. We’re Big Ten alums and fans but not of either of those schools. Come to think of it, it’s got to be kind of hard to root for either of them – you can choose either the dirty program that gives cash, cars, homework assistance and other things to the players (Sweatervested Jim Tressel’s OSU) or you can choose the school with the most unfriendly, boring, grumpy old fart this side of Joe Paterno (Lloyd Carr of Michigan).

However, this morning, Chris Spielman (pictured) was a guest on Mike and Mike in the Morning (yes, I hate them but I listen because usually the guests are good) to discuss the OSU/Michigan rivalry. First Spielman made up some story about how his father told him he better go to Ohio State or else he’d be “a friggin’ traitor and not allowed to step foot in [his] house again.” Somehow, I doubt it was quite that dramatic, but whatever.

The real thing that pisses us off was Spielman’s parting shot, wherein he dragged our beloved Boilermakers into the discussion. His interview was over and they were ready to move on but Spielman wanted to take a shot at Michigan (very professional – I love it when these dipsh-t athletes get jobs in the media and forget that they’re not supposed to root for a team). So, to make his point about how Michigan football gets some recruits from the state of Ohio, he says the following:

“Do you know what Michigan football would be without contributions from the state of Ohio? They’d be Purdue.”
Oh, kiss my ass, Chris Spielman. We were standing back and letting you dorks argue over a rivalry that doesn’t even make sense geographically. Oh, and it’s interesting that Purdue is the equivalent of a joke since in 2004 (the last time the two met), the Boilers beat your Buckeye asses. In 2003, OSU squeaked out a last-second win at home against those lowly Boilers. In 2002, Purdue gave Ohio State its toughest test of their entire, undefeated national championship season, coming within one down of beating the Suckeyes. And if we go all the way back to 2000, we all remember Drew Brees lighting up the Mike Doss-led secondary of OSU to the tune of 455 yards and a victory.

So suck it, Spielman. You’re officially on our mortal enemies list.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, you are a fucking baby. Get over it. Purdue sucks, and will always suck. "I am so mad that Chris Speilman made fun of my shitty team!! What a big jerk!!" What are you, twelve?

Grow some balls and get over it. Fucking baby. "How is it even a rivalry if the schools are not even by each other?" Lets see, maybe because the teams hate each other you moron. I would much rather watch OSU vs. Michigan for the Big Ten title and national title hopes than "a real rivalry" to you with Purdue versus Indiana with "smurf-turf" implications on the line.

I think you're mommy needs to get that dribble off of you're face and smack you across you're head and make you a man.

Matt said...

It's always great when people demand other people to "grow some balls and get over it" and suggest that somebody's mom "make you a man" and signs his post "Anonymous." Brilliant.

J Money said...

Wow, what a tool! What are you getting so worked up for, brave anonymous poster? Are you Chris Spielman's boyfriend or something?

Try understanding the humor with which these things are delivered, genius.

Anonymous said...

Purdue has beaten: Indiana State, Minnesota, Miami-OH, Ball State, Michigan State, Northwestern and Illinois. Any reasonably good team has crowned Purdue.

Being a completely neutral observer, Chris Spielman is absolutely right. Beat a decent football team before you start whining. If you played a decent non-conference schedule, you wouldn't even go to a bowl this year.

Anonymous said...

Problem is j money, you didn't appreciate Chris Speilman's humor and got yourself worked up enough about it to post on your blog.

So don't get all over anon for not finding your post humorous, unless you consider such witty barbs as "Suck it, Spielman" the height of hilarity.

boilerdowd said...

Fair points this season...Our Boilers need to beat good opponents to deserve respect. Honestly, they haven't done so in two seasons.

Doesn't change the fact that Speilman's a moron; if you don't think so, you probably have never watched a game in which he's doing color. He shows his true self each time he opens his mouth.

UM and tOSU's rivalry is pretty damned incredible and fun to watch. Speilman is just another reason to hate the Buckeyes- Go Blue!

J Money said...

Hey, I appreciate humor when you bash your rivals as much as anyone (see our other posts) and I think it's great that Spielman wants to rip his rival.... but when it's done at the expense of a school with proud fans/alums, well, we're entitled to not like it.

Not saying Purdue is some powerhouse, folks, calm down. Just wanted it on the record that Speilman's an ass.

Not only that, but we generally don't use foul language like our jackass anon poster whom Frank defends.

Andrew said...

I covered football for the Purdue paper in 2002 and I was standing on the goalline when Michael Jenkins beat Antwaun Rogers by a step and a half for the winning TD, after having been pretty much owned by the Purdue defense all game.

I had written a column the week prior about how I thought Ohio State could be beaten, how I thought the defense was overrated and I thought Purdue had a good chance to win. Apparently Ohio State fans thought my audacity deserved something like 300 pieces of hate mail, telling me what an idiot I was and how THE OSU was going to crush my team to powder and how Buckeye fans were going to have sex with my mom, sister and girlfriend, among other allied forces.

I just wanted to point out that every single one of the pieces of hate mail I got read EXACTLY like Anon No. 1's comment. Do they actually have a school in Columbus, or do they just keep people in cages typing on Internet message boards extolling the greatness of Ohio State football?

Paul the semi-awesome said...

I totally agree that Chris Spielman took one too many shots to the head while he played at osu.

Purdue's problem isn't with ohio, we could care less about the state where people masterbate in public bathrooms and were felonies for athletes are pretty common place. Biased sports reports, especially ex-athletes, are annoying and in my opinion should keep their rah-rah ness to themselves.
POTFH,
Paul

Anonymous said...

You think that's bad? I went to Vanderbilt asshole, at least you had Drew Brees. I had fuckin' Jay Cutler, he was supposedly our best player ever and guess what? WE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE A BOWL. Fuck Chris Spielman, Fuck the Big 10, and FUCK YOU.

boilerdowd said...

another awesome anonymous post- Thanks Vandy guy...you represent your alma mater well!

J Money said...

Hey, I do feel for fans of schools like Vandy. That's got to suck...

However, I think we're going to start monitoring the profanity around here and if your posts look like the foul-mouthed crap we've seen in this thread, they're going bye-bye.