Horse Inner Monologue: Okay, here we are... the race is about to start. Man, those oats were good a little while ago. If only I could get this fu-king leprauchaun off my back, I'd be all good. Wait, what am I doing being shoved into this tiny enclosure? Shit! They just closed the gate behind me! Man, I am crammed in here. Hey, don't you assholes remember I'm claustrophobic? Dammit.
What's all that crowd noise? Wait, something's about to happen, I can tell.... wheee! The gate's open and we're off! Hey, there's Bill! And Hank! And Joe! Hey, guys where are you all going? I guess I better go, too.
*pant pant*
Hey, fellas where the hell are we all going in such a GD hurry? Hey! Can't you hear me? Let me get a little closer to you.
*bumps other horse*
Hey. HEY! Mother-effer! Can't you hear me?
I'm just want to know --- wait, what are THOSE? Holy crap! Candy apples on the infield! Lemme attem!!!!!
3 comments:
I saw that yesterday. That horse is on crack! Right off the get go he's running into all the other horses! Hilarious. Love how the jockey totally jumps ship.
Thanks for the pity comment, E.
I like how boilerdowd's musing on scary thunderboomers gets more comments than my thoughtful effort on what a crazy horse might be thinking as he wigs out.
Whatever, you fickle readers. Go enjoy the NBA Finals.
thoroughbreds are so tightly wound, it's amazing this stuff doesn't happen more often.
Don't feel bad about the lack of responses- my storm entry was gold, pure gold!
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