Wednesday, August 19, 2009

More Glassy-Eyed Ideas

Fred Glass is just a fountain of ideas to improve the IU football experience. Eventually, one assumes, somewhere on his list is "better players" and "a coach." But give him time -- he'll get there.

For now, though, ideas abound to make things more fun. Like letting fans keep footballs and hoping drunken students are more likely to attend night games. (Hey, it's harder to see empty seats at night, too, am I right?)

From the article:

The school’s “Kicks for Keeps” program will allow fans to keep footballs when extra points and field goals go into the stands.

“We’re not going to put up a big net that catches a football,” Glass said.

“Much to my business’ offices chagrin, we are going to have a lot of these footballs go into the stands and be caught and taken home. We might have to trade them out because the kickers rub the ball and do all types of stuff that I don’t really understand,

Because when it comes to rubbing balls, Fred Glass doesn't get those kickers.

but they will get a real IU-regulation football.

"IU-regulation" footballs are footballs that are only used between the 40s.

That will cost us a little money, but I think that’s the kind of connection that help get people to come to games and be lifelong fans.”

Unless the Boilermakers are in town and rolling up 62 points again. Oh, wait, Fred's got a plan for that: copy Wrigley Field.

“We want to try to create a Wrigley Field-kind of buzz that real Hoosier fans throw it back,” he said. “So if Minnesota gets lucky and kicks a field goal late in the game, hopefully the culture will be to throw that ball back on the field.”

And if Purdue scores eight or nine touchdowns, you'll have a rash of torn rotator cuffs from the fans repeatedly hurling footballs.... probably directed at Bill Lynch's skull.

In addition, night games!

“We are trying to be fan-friendly for our students. (For) college students, noon can be a tough rally point for them,” he said.

"As is having to root for IU football," Glass did not go on to say.

“And I’ve heard feedback positively from people with young children. There are so many Saturday activities, soccer, youth football, they feel it will enable them to come to games more.”

Oh, Fred. Eternally optimistic. People give any reason they can to avoid Hoosier football -- you hear "activities."

Hear that, citizens of Bloomington? You're running out of excuses. Your kid doesn't have a soccer game at 8 PM, does he? Get your ass out to Memorial Stadium. We've got 2,000 seats for you to spread out in.

(Thanks to reader Patrick G for the heads-up.)

12 comments:

Ross McLochness said...

I don't see how encouraging "fans" to throw things back to the field could ever go wrong.

Anonymous said...

But what happens when the stadium is filled with opposing fans? Do they toss back the IU scores (when they happen)?

Ross McLochness said...

Luckily, that won't be too large an issue.

Another idea lost in this "throw it back" scenario: you have to be in the crappiest seats to catch the ball. Seeing as Memorial Stadium will not sell out but once, they'll be largely kicking to no one except little kids.

Whoo hoo, indeed.

Plang said...

As the school's AD, he better know all about rubbing balls together. What kind of AD doesn't know about that?!?!

boileraae said...

So how bad do they have to be playing before they turn the red light on too entice all the fans away from the game to the concourses for a $1 weiner? Bait and switch? Ooh, shiny!

Purdue Matt said...

This guy is incredibly lame.

boilerdowd said...

It worked for the XFL...oh wait a second...

Chris said...

"So if Minnesota gets lucky and kicks a field goal late in the game"

It's so cute how he turns certainties into hypotheticals.

zlionsfan said...

I'm assuming the "people with young children" won't be bringing the kids to the games, because an 8:00 kickoff means no way in hell, especially considering it'll take an hour to get out of the Memorial Stadium parking lots.

Also, the bonus for that keep-the-football thing will be that IU will end up with a whole lot of crappy footballs, if the fans really do it like Wrigley. I'm sure someone will explain that part to Fred eventually.

I did notice that he did not include punts and passes into the stands. Now that would have been very expensive. Not that this idea won't be. I wasn't aware that IU was looking for ways to throw away more money on the football program.

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