Seth Davis' imaginary friend

If you follow us on Twitter, you know we're not fans of Seth Davis. I guess that's fair since he's not a fan of the topic we cover- Purdue sports.

It's one thing to not like Purdue and give good, solid analytical reasoning for why you think that. It's quite another to mercilessly-pound an idea with nothing as your defense other than opinion. Davis does this over and over again...and he's wrong a lot. CBS doesn't seem to mind...but I do.

A few weeks ago when Purdue was in the top-10, Davis was asked who would be the first team out in that group. He of course answered Purdue. He went further to say that Purdue wouldn't get past the first weekend...without having any clue who Purdue would be playing. Let's look at Matty's tourney record, Seth- wait, nevermind, that'd take research...don't worry about it, I know it won't happen.

All season he's consistently had Purdue lower than where they've belonged and where they've landed in the poll. In fact, for much of the early season, he didn't rank Purdue. And once they had earned his good graces, they hung in the 20-24 range. Is it because they hadn't played anybody at that point? Could be. But, that very situation didn't stop him from ranking his beloved Blue Devils consistently in the top-5.

Davis has a problem with Purdue-I guess because Purdue beat Duke in Alaska a decade ago (I can't think of another reason). Whatever the reason really doesn't matter, but the proof's in the pudding and we have plenty of rancid dairy dessert all around the interwebnet with Davis' pasty fingerprints all over it.

Most-recently, he penned an article about 54 potential NBA players that are currently in college and what NBA scouts think of them. The problem is, he has no specific scout's opinion. Instead, he sites "several scouts" as his source...and he refuses to tell us who they are, so they can stay anonymous.

Sweet.

It's a nice place to be- you write an opinion-based piece, with your name attached, and you have no culpability. This type of pseudo-journalism is a pet peeve of ours at this site. But, let's take a look at our favorite guys in this article: Of course, JaJuan Johnson and E'Twaun Moore.

JaJuan Johnson, 6-10 senior center, Purdue
Some people really like him, but I just don't know how he gets his game off. I don't think his post game will transfer, so you're looking at a 6-10 jump shooter who will have a hard time guarding any positions in our league. He strikes me as a combination of Marcus Camby and Hakim Warrick. I'd say he's on the bubble for the first round. I think he makes the league, but he won't get a lot of scratch.

Honestly, I don't even know what the first sentence means...so I won't spend a ton of time on it. I guess he's saying he doesn't understand how well Johnson will play in the league. He jibbers his way through the review of JJ, saying little and comparing 25 to a guy who is a rebound-first player who's been in the league for 14 seasons (doesn't sound like a bad investment for an NBA team...but JJ is far from a banger on the boards) and Hakim Warrick, who while a few inches shorter is a very-similar player, statistically, as he left college. But, Warrick was more of a combo player and JJ will more than likely never play shooting forward in the NBA. Davis ends the write-up by saying he won't "get a lot of scratch". Once again, not exactly sure what he means, but I don't think it's a positive.

So, let's compare JJ to a few of the guys, that he's played against, that Davis' imaginary...I mean...anonymous sources are really high on.

Sullinger- "I love him."

He's good, he's young...a lot to like there. When JJ faced him, here's how it went:

Player Pts. Reb. Blk.

Sullinger 17 7 0

Johnson 22 7 0

I guess JJ's game did kinda "get off" in that contest...let's try another.

Benson- "I like him."

It's not love, but it's definitely more positive than his review of JJ.

Player Pts. Reb. Blk.

Benson 16 14 2

Johnson 25 11 2

Not too shabby...JJ also added 5 assists. Benson had 0.

Next, John Leuer- "He's more skilled than you think."

Player Pts. Reb. Blk.

Leuer 24 13 0

Johnson 23 4 3

Once again, JJ did OK, I guess.

Now onto Smooge's review:

E'Twaun Moore, 6-4 senior guard, Purdue
I think someone will take him in the second round. He's small and not very athletic, so that's a bad combination, but the kid has found a way to get it done at a high level. But again, who is he? What does he bring to the table? He can get to the basket at the college level, but he doesn't shoot it great. He reminds me of Reece Gaines, who didn't make it in the league because he had no position. Or Joe Forte from North Carolina. Forte was better than Moore in college, but he didn't make it in the NBA.

I think Moore will have a fight to be successful in the league because he is shorter and he doesn't appear to be quite as quick as many of the guys playing shooting guard in the NBA. So I understand some of the criticism. But the line that really bothers me is this: "But again, who is he?"

Here's who he is: He's a guy who's led his team in scoring for three of his four seasons. He's All-Big Ten, an Academic All-American, an Honorable Mention All-American and a lockdown defender.

Unlike JJ who's squared off against quite a few future draft prospects, I could only find one on the list that Moore had faced- Duke's Nolan Smith.

Davis said of Smith,

"Can he make it as a two guard? That's the question. I'm not sure he has the kind of speed and quickness to be able to attack guys. I think he's proven enough to be drafted and he'll figure it out once he gets up there."

Okie doke. Smith's career numbers look like this: 12.7 pts. 2.7 ast. 2.7 reb.

Moore: 15.0 pts 2.8 ast. 4.4 reb.

But Smith played in the tough ACC while Moore played in the lowly BT, right? Yeah, and Smith never had any talent around him at Duke while Moore was always surrounded by some of the best teams in America. Oh wait...I thought Purdue was only a two-man team. Nevermind.

Then head-to-head, Smith must have just owned Smooge, right??

Player Pts. Reb. Ast. Stl.

Smith 15 5 4 0

Moore 18 4 1 2

Alright, maybe not. It just seems odd that Moore is too small at 6'4", but Smith at 6'2" is not. And Moore is not athletic, but Smith, who will be drafted to a position he doesn't play in college deserves a chance to "figure it out" on the next level.

Other interesting tidbits:

Singler- "I'm a Singler guy all the way."

Plumlee- "If you stick around, you're going to get better."

(If I didn't know better, I'd think that was a plea...not a review.)

And if you really wanna pick this piece apart, read some of the UNC player reviews.

I know, supposedly these words weren't even Davis'...but since he's the only real person I can find mentioned as responsible for the article, I'll pin it on him. I guess if nothing else, Davis is consistent.

Consistently awful.

Here's a Column From a Corn-Fed Dumbass

This is Don Cunningham. He's not very bright. And he's yet another shining example of the fact that traditional media is dying not because of irresponsible bloggers, but because of lazy, pathetic writing.

Let's give Don the treatment, shall we?

His article is entitled "Huskers in the Big Ten: Count me out, please."

First of all....who cares if you approve, Don? I mean, seriously... who effing cares? Beyond that, Don starts by mocking the Big Ten in numerous ways.

No. I won't go.

Sorry. I am a traditionalist of sorts and others who are similarly burdened know my pain.

Yes, a traditionalist. A Big 12 traditionalist, if you will. The Big 12 does indeed have a storied past, going all the way back to 1996. The Big Ten's tradition? A mere 100 years more.

A road trip to Madison just isn't the same as one to Columbia.

Really? You're actually comparing Columbia, Missouri (which I had to look up) to Madison? Have you been to Madison, Wisconsin? I hate the Badgers with a fury, but it's repeatedly listed as one of the best places to road trip and among the best college towns in the country. But okay. Solid.

Where's the pizzazz in "Illini." (Besides what self-respecting school would stoop so low as to restructure their official name to get their nickname?)

Yes, "Cornhusker" is much better.

As it now stands, we are the only "NU" in our league. This new grouping doubles that number. And the other one plays football in a city. In the shadows of skyscrapers. Worse yet, Northwestern's website announces their intent to play a game at Wrigley Field.

Yes, that's right. The Wildcats at Wrigley. Somewhere Papa Bear George Halas has got to be sick.

Wait, what? I don't get it. What's wrong with Chicago? What's wrong with playing a game at Wrigley? Oh, right, Don Cunningham doesn't like cities, with all of their bustlin'. He prefers down-home football played in cornfields like in Field of Dreams, small-town people, and his wife's biscuits and gravy. That's all he needs. He's a simple man and doesn't need your horn-honking big cityfolk.

By the way, Don, do you know where Papa Bear George Halas went to school? Illinois.

Wait. The best is yet to come. Ever notice how all of the games between those northern universities have a "trophy" at stake? Minnesota-Wisconsin: Paul Bunyan's Axe. Michigan-Michigan State: Paul Bunyan's Trophy. Illinois- Purdue: The Old Oaken Bucket. Minnesota-Michigan: The Little Brown Jug.

Yeah, I don't feel like looking them all up to see how many he got wrong, but Purdue and Illinois don't play for the Old Oaken Bucket. Nice try, though. See, when you're insulting a large group, it's best to have your basic facts right since so much else of what you're saying is so very stupid.

Evidently these folks spend their time drinking or chopping.

As opposed to the Big 12, where in places like Austin, Texas and Norman, Oklahoma the lasses are pure and the townspeople are sober and hard-working. And not "chopping," kind of work, either!

Not only am I not showing up, I might not ever leave my house again.

Promise?

You want to talk academic excellence? Why join a group of esteemed institutions who refuse to correctly reflect their membership in their title?

Do you REALLY want to go there, Don? Do you REALLY want to compare the Big Ten and Big 12 academically? Let me answer my rhetorical question for you: No, you do not.

Might pay to divide the conference membership in half - calling the Eastern bloc The Pick Six and the Western front The Deep Six.

Wow, this is just utter nonsense. Don had a higher word count required -- like with a 6th-grader's paper -- and so he threw together some words. I also suspect he felt he was being clever by using "bloc" to insinuate the Big Ten are a bunch of commies.

Volleyball competition will be limited to one game, Penn State/Nebraska. To be played at Wrigley Field on Thanksgiving.

Don, what the hell is wrong with you? Is this supposed to be funny...I guess?

Men's basketball? Well there will be new gyms in which to embarrass ourselves. That's a plus. No. Not really.

Ah, so there's part of the truth. You're just afraid. Afraid of change. You're an old man, I should have known.

I suppose the yet-to-be-created divisional football championship game will have a catchy crown title too.

The Ox Tail Trophy. Blue. It'll be blue, no doubt.

You, sir, are a flaming moron and you should never again be allowed near a keyboard. And if I were Nebraska or the Big 12, I'd say, "Thanks, but please don't be on our side, Don."

(Thanks to Joey for the heads-up.)

Handsome Lad Says Knight Should Coach Northwestern

The strikingly handsome and debonair gentleman you see pictured here isn't just a sexy piece of eye candy, ladies... that's right, he can write, too! More than just a hat rack, chickies!

Mike Hutsell of the news and tribune says that Bob Knight isn't done coaching and that Northwestern would be the perfect place for him. I can't argue this phenominal logic -- what struggling program wouldn't want an over-the-hill dinosaur who is a constant PR nightmare and a generally all-around embarrassing blowhard? And from Knight's point of view, of course it's a match made in heaven! An 0-10 (in Big Ten play) school... no where to go but up!

Let's also take a look at some of Mike Hutsell's points, as he paints us a picture with his words and makes it clear that Bob Knight would be purrrrr-fect in Evanston.

I don’t think Bob Knight is done, not even close.

Whoops, poor punctuation there, Mike, right out of the gate. But I hear you barkin', big dog! Now tell me why.

I can’t buy the fact that Knight’s career would end the way it did. As a footnote to the Super Bowl while spending the twilight of his career playing in a half-empty arena at a football school in Texas.

Hmm, well, where to begin here... first, does Mike have an editor? Because this is nonsense. First of all, Bob Knight retiring isn't a "footnote to the Super Bowl." If Rodney Harrison went out and had a stripper inject some HGH into his ass, THAT would be a "footnote to the Super Bowl." Also, Bob Knight hasn't "played" any basketball for Texas Tech. Oh, and Texas Tech is a "football school"? Really? That's funny, because, well... no, it isn't.

That’s not Bob Knight’s style. No way, not even close.

Yes, we covered that you don't think he's done.

Whatever the reason for Bob Knight’s oddly-timed step-aside from a Texas Tech program he crafted into a consistent, if unspectacular winner, it just doesn’t make any sense for him to leave now.

Yes, again... we covered that you don't think he's done. Also? Since I'm in a mood to be a bitchy, nit-picker, what the f-ck is an "oddly-timed step-aside"? Sounds like someone trying to line dance and doing it wrong. And also, the comma should go after "unspectacular," not after "winner."

Anyway... three sentences later:

There’s no way Knight’s done.

Um, really? That's amazing because I haven't heard you the FIRST THREE TIMES YOU SAID IT!

There’s a perfect fit out there — if it ever comes open.

Oh, so calling a job that isn't open "perfect" IS a bit of a stretch, yes?

It would be an opening in the Big Ten, it would be a job that would allow Knight to recruit the type of players he thrives on coaching,

Untalented white guys?

and it would be a job in a hot spot filled with some of his most ardent supporters who would flock to his arena every tipoff of every night.

Every tipoff of every night. Brilliant prose. What does it mean, though? When DOES the night "tipoff"? We may never know.

Change is always a possibility at a school that has lost every conference game it has played by at least 10 points, and tell me turning “The General” wouldn’t be a shot in the arm for the a program that has defined the doldrums of college hoops throughout its feeble existence.

Tell you "turning the General"... what? And just look at the rest of that sentence... "wouldn't be a shot in the arm for the a program..." What the hell IS this gobbeldy-gook? I'll ask again... don't you have an editor, Mike??

Then a couple paragraphs later, he hits us with this fragment, standing all alone like it's a sentence or something profound:

And in Chicagoland, where the Indiana alumni base who already turn Welsh-Ryan Arena into Assembly Hall North anytime the Hoosiers visit campus.

What? That's not even a sentence.

I also love that this is a "two-page" article and you have to click to keep going and then this is everything on the second page... bring it home, Mike!

Oh yeah, there’s that whole Indiana thing, too.

Northwestern has played Charlie Brown to the Hoosiers’ Lucy for years and at no point in the history of the program have the Wildcats gone into Bloomington and become a winner on Branch McCracken Court.

Tell me Knight wouldn’t live to be the guy who becomes the first to make that happen.

I don't think Bob Knight could make that happen... nor do I think he cares to make it happen. In addition, Mike Hutsell, you are a true pioneer of sportswriting and space should be made on the set of the Sports Reporters every Sunday morning for you.

Seriously, this article looks like a report a fifth-grader from Bloomington would write.