As the Hutch Turns

One of our favorite pasttimes around here when we had nothing better to do was to string up our Terry Hutchens pinata and take a few whacks at him. The great part about Hutchens was that it didn't matter which column or blog post you read of his -- they were all chock full of IU homerism, poor grammar and syntax, strange references, complaints about how tiring it was to be a sportswriter, etc. You always had something to mock. And everyone knows we're jerkfaces who like to mock.

Well, things took a turn recently. Hutch was removed from being the IU beat writer at the Indy Star and was reportedly going to move to cover basketball recruiting. This, sadly, would have required Hutch to at least pretend to have an ounce of journalistic impartiality, so he did what any self-respecting Hoosier-lover would do -- he bolted. He's now landed at Fox's Scout network, specifically at HoosierNation.com.

(Some people are under the impression that Hutchens was let go from the Star. I'm not clear on this, and there doesn't seem to be a definitive report out there -- what is known is that he was removed from the IU beat, reportedly as part of a "shake up" and assigned to cover basketball recruiting. This didn't seem like a fit to many of us and so it makes sense to think Terry would have then walked away rather than doing something outside his comfort zone. That said, this is still mostly conjecture on our part. Educated conjecture. Hutchens has not offered any more details on his twitter feed -- just his announcement of going to Scout. Before that, it was the usual IU cheerleading.)

Terry can now "cover" the Hoosiers and Tom Crean in his customary, fawning way. And his fans are thrilled:

dbwheat says: Great news. I've always liked Hutch. Especially compared to that other so-called sports writer for the Indy Star. 

Yeah, those "so called writers." Anyone who doesn't shill for IU, well, I just don't think they can be trusted! Yeeehaw!

bronkonagurski says: The IndyStar has turned to crap for a while now.  He might be better off this way.

Indeed. Get the decent men out of there while we still can! Let's get them to a bastion of journalism.... a scout message board.

And JCBasketball opines: Hutch will do this place a lot of good.

I agree. As long as he learns that a "blog" the entire thing and a "post" is what he writes each day. 

Other rumored changes included the Star getting a Purdue beat writer, which Purdue fans responded to with derision. The Indy Star? A Purdue beat writer? I think most Purdue fans figured even if this happened, it would all be a ruse, where the "beat writer" would pretend to cover Purdue just up until Purdue fans began trusting him and then -- BAM -- he'd tear off his polo shirt to reveal an IU jersey and candystriped pants.

Well, the Star must have decided, "Meh, we haven't paid attention to Purdue in decades so why start now?" Because according to Kent Sterling (whose name should really be that of a porn star or a superhero -- or a superhero porn star?), no such Purdue beat writer will be assigned. *sad trombone*

You'll note in Sterling's column that no ND beat writer will be assigned, either, but I would think that's less concerning to ND fans since they already have their own network, as well as legions of lazy columnists around the country to carry their water. 

Why are the guys at a Purdue blog writing about an IU guy? Well, because we have a special love for Terry, and he knows it. Also, because what else are we going to write about right now?

In truth, I'd like to say that while we may rip on entities (like ESPN or the BTN) and individuals (such as Terry), we don't truly wish bad things upon anyone. Terry has a family to support, like so many of us, so we wish him well in terms of having gainful employment. (See, Terry! We can be nice!) That said, when you write publicly for a living, you're open to criticism, which we're more than happy to offer.

Here's to more column-filling goodness from Hutch. 

Giving Hutch Credit

This actually isn't a satirical piece, if you can imagine that. No, we're actually here to give Terry Hutchens his due respect since he got something damn close to accurate -- something that we tweaked him on back in October.

It takes gracious, respectful, non-childish people to admit when they're wrong. We're none of those things, but we're going to show the Indiana University Sportswriter of the Year some respect, anyway.

Ol' Terry had the conference finishing in the order on the left, while the actual finish is on the right:

Terry                                           Reality

1. OSU                                       OSU
2. MSU                                      MSU
3. Wisconsin                               Michigan
4. Michigan                                Wisconsin
5. Illinois                                     Indiana
6. Indiana                                   Purdue
7. Purdue                                   Northwestern
8. Northwestern                         Iowa
9. Iowa                                      Minnesota
10. Minnesota                            Illinois
11. Nebraska                             Nebraska
12. Penn State                            Penn State

So Terry hit four on the nose (first, second, eleventh and twelfth) and almost nailed it all with the exception of Illinois. And who among us could possibly have foreseen Illinois finishing tenth in the conference? But pull them out of the equation and Terry's crystal ball showed the correct order for Indiana, Purdue, Northwestern, Iowa, Minny, Nebraska and PSU. That's.....actually commendable. If only his crystal ball also told him what pant size to buy Tom Crean next Christmas.

Understand, this is not an endorsement of Terry Hutchens writing. We do not recommend you subject yourself to his inane ramblings, which recently have included a "What if Kentucky missed 14 more free throws against IU?" theme and has generated some hilarious additional article topic suggestions on Twitter. (Search on #futurehutcharticles.)

However, we did call Terry out and while we detest his blatant homerism and gorilla-level writing ability, we wanted to also show we're able to acknowledge when Terry find an acorn and that we were wrong to doubt him.

Of course, Purdue did finish higher that Hutch predicted....so there!

Terry Hutchens Hits a Homer

For those of you who don't like the way we often relentless badger people who disrespect the Purdue basketball program, we're going to do our best this year to let mindless sportswriters churn out their tired cliches and ignore Purdue basketball to their hearts' content.

At least, I was going to try to do that. Then Terry Hutchens, resident IU shill, released his preseason Big Ten basketball rankings.

For those who don't feel like clicking through, lest they get some dope on themselves, here's his ranking:


1. Ohio State
2. Michigan State
3. Wisconsin
4. Michigan
5. Illinois
6. Indiana
7. Purdue
8. Northwestern
9. Iowa
10. Minnesota
11. Nebraska
12. Penn State

Now, this isn't the first time I've seen Purdue knocked a bit down the list. But when you release such a list and also include this remark...

"Now, I can already hear it from the Purdue people but to be honest I really wrestled with that one."

...then you sort of expect some explanation, right? Some thought? Some breakdown as to how you arrived at the decision that a second-place team that has never shown significant steps backward during the Matt Painter era would suddenly fall to the lower half of the league. But no, Terry only offers this wisdom:

"I think you could make a case for Purdue at No. 6 and IU at No. 7. It all comes down to Robbie Hummel. (I did have Hummel on my preseason all-Big Ten team by the way)."

And that's it. No more about Purdue. And granted, I know it's a Hoosiers Insider column, but come on, Terry. Provide something to support your opinions! It's part of your damn job!

I also like that he allows that you could make a case for Purdue as high as....No. 6. Wow, really? That high, Terry? Are you sure? Do you know the last time Purdue finished lower than 4th in the conference? It was Painter's first year, '05-'06. The last time they weren't at least first or second place was 2007.

We often point out that success in decades gone by does not have anything to do with the upcoming season -- and the same applies here. How Purdue has fared in the past half-dozen seasons really has no bearing on how they will fare in '11-'12. HOWEVER, if you're a professional columnist and you are writing about how Purdue will fall to their worst finish since the dawn of the Matt Painter era, especially given the talent still residing in West Lafayette, shouldn't you explain why you think that?

Nope, apparently not. You just say it all comes down to Robbie Hummel, the one player on the team you can remember. And the player who you once wrote would be lucky to amount to a role player in the Big Ten.

(Interestingly, the link to the post where Terry wrote that is no longer online. Huh. Interesting.)

The Terry Hutchens Chronicles Continue

Our old friend Terry is back at his keyboard after a vacation, of which he will “spare us the details.” (Does that mean he had bad diarrhea or something?) Anyway, he’s back and ready to drop some knowledge on us about Rick Greenspan’s resignation from IU and, I bet you’re going to be shocked at this, but ole Terry is taking the contrary opinion to what every sane, sentient, thinking human being who heard the details of the Sampson mess has thought. Terry thinks IU is better with Greenspan in charge. Seriously, I’m not kidding.

He starts with the bold title: “The Greenspan Resignation: Was it Necessary?” Which is funny, since there were columnists who thought IU should get the NCAA “death penalty.” So yeah, I think it was necessary. But let’s move along.

…once Sampson was shown the door, a lot of people felt that Rick Greenspan should have been running in place right behind him.

This choice of words amuses me, because it makes it sound like Greenspan should be jogging “in place” like he’s getting ready to work out or something. Yes, I’m easily amused.

I'm guessing that was the majority opinion on this particular topic.
I also have a feeling that it's not going to surprise a lot of people that I'm in the minority on this one.

Oh, Terry, you’re such a rule-breaker! You’re also an IU lapdog, so no, this isn’t shocking at all.

Perhaps it removes the wolves from the door, or as Greenspan pointed out today in the one-on-one interview I had with him early Thursday evening, maybe it's better this way because he won't be as much of a distraction.

Don’t you love how Terry slips in there that he had a “one-on-one interview” with Greenspan. What a get! But then get the next speculative paragraph:

But while I do understand that as the director of athletics, and the man who hired Kelvin Sampson, that Greenspan needed to accept a great deal of the blame, I'm still not convinced that Sampson was his hire. I honestly believe that IU president Adam Herbert drove the hiring of Kelvin Sampson and that Greenspan was instructed to come along for the ride. He said all of the things at the time of the hire that he was supposed to say, but my opinion is that Greenspan was being the good soldier. Now, I've tried to get Rick to admit that so many times but he has always taken the high road. He has never felt it was his place to engage in those types of discussions. It wasn't from lack of opportunity. Greenspan has been asked that question time and again. But each time, he has always taken the same approach and that was simply that he didn't feel anything was gained by going there. As he has surely realized today though, plenty was lost.

“Being the good soldier”? He “has always taken the high road”? Are you effing SERIOUS with this claptrap, Hutchens?? Are you honestly – HONESTLY – trying to make Rick Greenspan out to be an innocent pawn in all of this? The Athletic Director? With regard to the hiring of the Indiana University head basketball coach? Really? That’s your story, huh?

When I think of the types of people that Rick Greenspan hired at IU, and the list is a long one, one person always stands out as not being in line with the others and that was Kelvin Sampson. Line up Terry Hoeppner, Tom Crean, Felicia Legette-Jack, Tracy Smith and Kelvin Sampson and one guy sticks out like a sore thumb. And that's why I have my serious doubts that Sampson could have been Greenspan's guy.

To be fair, though, at Indiana, THE program is men’s basketball. Not women’s basketball (Legette-Jack) or baseball (Smith), or even football. Basketball is the end-all, be-all at IU and so if they were ever going to take a chance on hiring someone with a dubious past but whom they thought could win, it would be for basketball – and that’s precisely what they did. They made a deal with the devil and it backfired. They all KNEW this was a possibility. They were all asked about it. And they all claimed Kelvin had learned his lessons, even as they and Oklahoma were suffering as a result of Sampson’s indiscretions.

Rick Greenspan is not innocent in any way, shape or form here. Regardless of what went down, he went along with it and didn’t feel strongly against Sampson – and being passive about something is equivalent with allowing/supporting it. Just ask any parent.

Anyway, more from Terry about how magnanimous Rick Greenspan is:

I think most reasonable people were thinking in the back of their minds that if IU was ever charged with 'failure to monitor' or the more serious charge of 'lack of institutional control' that Greenspan was going to have a difficult time surviving it. But here's the part that I don't understand. Yes, the charge was made and yes, the university acknowledged that in a press release Thursday afternoon. But IU also said it would "vigorously'' fight that allegation. President McRobbie said so and Rick Greenspan did as well. Neither of those individuals believe that the accusation is true. So if that's the case, why doesn't Greenspan dig his heels in and fight it? What he will tell you is that the fight ultimately wouldn't be worth the casualties along the way. He'll tell you that sometimes you have to do what is in the best interests of Indiana University, and not necessarily what is in the best interests of Rick Greenspan. In the end, Greenspan just didn't feel the gains would outweigh the losses.

Yes, indeed. I’m sure Rick Greenspan cares much more about IU than himself and doesn’t want to incur “casualties along the way” (what the f-ck does this even mean?). Yes, sometimes you need to do what’s in the best interests of IU and not Rick Greenspan. He’s really a hero, don’t you see? After hiring a cheater and backing him until he had no other choice than to… uhh, form a committee to decide what to do about him… Greenspan then fired said cheater and put the storied basketball program into disarray and likely set them back years. And now, he’s doing what’s in the best interests of the University. Well, even if this is true, as an IU fan/alum, I would be saying, “It’s about damn time!”

I still believe that Greenspan did a lot more good than bad in his four years at Indiana.

And I still believe I'm svelte, Terry. Neither of us are right. Greenspan was part of a team of greedy, opportunistic jackholes that destroyed the basketball program’s credibility. Try dealing with that, Terry.

He turned the financial picture around and took IU from the red to the black.

He did this? Rick Greenspan? I had no idea he was an accounting genius. Must have used Quickbooks.

Though he won't see its completion by the time he leaves Dec. 31, Greenspan was also a big part of the basketball practice facility that will one day make recruiting a hundred percent easier for Crean and Legette-Jack.

Tom Crean agrees and is presently holding up his cell phone so a recruit can hear how great the facility is.

And recruiting will be “a hundred percent easier,” Terry? Wow, that means they’ll be fighting them off with a stick!

He had some great hires, and pulled the trigger on some much-needed changes such as the tenures of Gerry DiNardo and Mike Davis.

Yes, Gerry DiNardo and Mike Davis, one in the same. Both complete failures who needed to be run out of town. DiNardo simply didn’t win enough and was frequently embarrassed by Purdue, and Davis… well, Mike Davis simply was too black didn’t win enough only got to the championship game once. Getting rid of him to hire a known cheater was a fantastic move. Way to support your argument, Terry.

He was professional, hard-working and respected within the Big Ten and the movers and shakers with the IU Alumni Association.

“Movers and shakers”? Who are you, my grandmother? Who says this?

For those of you who believe that Indiana athletics is in a better place today because Greenspan's days as athletic director are numbered, we'll just have to agree to disagree.

First, nice syntax. Second, nobody thinks things are BETTER “today” because Greenspan will be leaving. But might it cleanse the program…eventually? Yes, I think it might.

I understand a lot of people feel that Greenspan had to go. I know I'm in the minority with my opinion but sometimes you have to go with what your gut tells you.

And right now, Terry’s sizable gut is telling him: Cheetos for lunch!

Terry Hutchens Chronicles – April 2008
Terry Hutchens Chronicles – May 2008

THC -- Conversating With Terry

We’re back with another installment of the Terry Hutchens Chronicles, featuring Handsome Terry Hutchens, who wrote a book called “Let ‘Er Rip,” which is either about the 1995 Colts or Terry’s favorite fart-in-an-enclosed-space joke.

Anyway, today’s session is going to be about correspondence with ole Terry, and his wonderful ‘tude towards this readers.

As you may recall, one of the things that started many Purdue fans on the road to disliking Terry was his mocking of several players who have become standouts on the Purdue basketball team. Now, many of us would probably have let this go, but reader Purdue Matt is not among them. He decided he would hold Terry’s sizable feet to the fire and check in with Terry from time to time to see if his tune had changed regarding Robbie Hummel.

This past February, Matt wrote to Terry and asked him this:

Have you changed your mind about Robbie Hummel? Do you still think he'sunimpressive?

Terry’s snooty reply:

How many games has he played in his college career? I'll make my determination when that career is done, thank you. Terry

Maybe it’s because he has a girl’s name, I don’t know, but why the attitude, Terry?

Matt followed with a salient point and question:

Does that mean the jury is still out on Eric Gordon as well since he hasn'tfinished his college career? Why can't you just admit that you were wrongabout Hummel?

To which Terry, apparently already agitated from perhaps bad gas or something, begins to lose it. At 6:38 PM he replies with this:

Yes, I think the jury is still out on Gordon, too. The only difference isthat his career will be over in two months.

Ah, yes, a dig that Robbie isn’t going pro so he must not be that good yet.

And then, two minutes later, he writes to Matt again:

And why is it so important to you that I admit that I was wrong aboutHummel, anyway? I cover INDIANA UNIVERSITY BASKETBALL. I made a comment about Hummel and the recruiting class in a blog. It was my opinion. Why do I have to retract every comment I make when it was a matter of opinion.

Stop screaming Terry. And if you’re going to hide behind the fact that you cover INDIANA BASKETBALL then doesn’t that invalidate your earlier opinions on Hummel and Moore? I’m confused. You covered INDIANA BASKETBALL back then, too, right? Hello? Terry?

Matt decides not to let him off the hook, though, and responds to Terry’s question of why it’s so important that he admit he was wrong about Hummel (which should be obvious, but hey, this is Terry Hutchens we’re talking about):

Simple. Accountability.

And do you know what Terry thinks about that? Well, he’s a serious journalist, you understand… and so he values his readers – FOR HIM TO POOP ON!

Thanks, but I don't need to be accountable to you. End of conversation. Thanks for the note....Terry

Good gracious. What a prick. And, um, yeah you sort of do, Terry. See a blog with comments and an email address invite people to question you. And as a reporter/writer/opinion-giver you actually ARE required to be accountable. Probably was talked about in journalism class. Class… you know, CLASS, Terry? School? Big rooms, smart people talking at the front. You trying to look down girl’s shirts… you remember school, right Terry?

I sort of imagine Terry Hutchens envisioned that when he started writing his “blog” and his email address was out there that he’d get nothing but fawning emails about how awesome he is and how brilliant a writer he is. I also imagine he expected to be asked all sorts of questions about being an “expert” on IU sports. Instead, he gets challenged now and then and deservedly so, since he posts horse dung like Monday of this week, where he actually makes his readers suffer through stories about tracking down a cell phone number that he already had but managed to lose. Gripping, Terry, gripping. I can’t wait for your next post, where you detail the long line at Taco Bell.

But Matt’s exchanges with ole Terry weren’t the only ones we have access to.

In mid-February, IU played Illinois and the Illinois fans got all over Eric Gordon. And in the front row was Gordon’s family, and ESPN caught his father more than once standing up in front of people and then TURNING to the crowd with his hands up, as though egging them on. And then everyone bashed the Illinois fans for being meanies. Including Terry. And he started his blog post the next day with this title: “A Sad State of Affairs.”

For starters, Terry, who the hell do you think you are? Tolstoy? “A sad state of affairs…”? Seriously? Maybe this is just the writer in me, but, hey, shut up.

And then he went on to talk about how awful the Illinois fans were and how they need to “just get over it.” And then he laid it on thick about his crush, Eric:

But let's get back to Gordon and the way he was treated by the Illini crowd. OK, you had your chance to act like 10-year-olds (which is an insult to 10-year-olds by the way) in the way you treated Eric Gordon Thursday night … You called him names, you got into his head, you told him that no one liked him, and you booed him from start to finish. I'm sure when you went home from the game, you left the building with your chests puffed out and really feeling good about the way you treated a 19-year-old kid. But I'll tell you this … all you did on national TV Thursday night was embarrass yourself, your team and your university.

And for what? Because a young man, at the age of 17, changed his mind. A really nice young man by the way. One of the most polite, soft-spoken, respectful young men I have ever been around in college athletics. The kind of kid you would be proud to call your son. And yet, this nice kid had to endure that Thursday night because he changed his mind. … So he acted like a kid who didn't want to break up with his girlfriend because he didn't want to hurt her feelings … No, you're a loser because you changed your mind. You're public enemy No. 1 in the state of Illinois because you fulfilled a dream by playing close to home and representing your state university after telling another school that originally you wanted to play for them. I can understand people being disappointed, but to allow that disappointment to reach the level it did Thursday night was a travesty. And all for what? Because Eric Gordon changed his mind. Imagine that, a teenage boy changed his mind.

Wow. Just… wow. So I had to comment. I posted – or tried to post – a comment on his blog under this post about how Terry needs to step back a bit because he’s clearly too close to this situation and too biased. And, um, I may have laid it on thick myself, too, (some say I do that) and implied that Terry wanted to wear Eric’s letterman jacket... and that he was hoping Eric might invite him to the Sadie Hawkins Dance. That sort of thing.

I also took umbrage with another post he wrote that week, around AJ Ratliff leaving the IU program. What bothered me greatly about that post was that Terry was implying he was going to talk about AJ and what a great kid he is and what a loss it is for IU. Instead, he spends the first two paragraphs talking about his “relationships” with former IU luminaries, such as Dane Freaking Fife, Jarrad Odle, AJ Moye, Luke Recker and Gibran Hamdan… as though we’re all supposed to be impressed with what a well-connected and hip dude Terry Hutchens is. He doesn’t mention Ratliff until the third paragraph of a five paragraph post. Simply idiotic. And I told him so in his comments.

Shockingly, my comments were not posted. Instead, I got the following note in the Boiled Sports mailbox:

J Money,
Thanks for the insightful blog responses.Boiled Sports is an interesting site. I would think if you could get a fewpage views it would be something people might enjoy reading. It looks like most of your blogs get a handful of hits which is too bad. Sorry you don't agree with my opinions or the way I do my job, but I'm OKwith that. All the best… Terry

Ahhh, and the jabbing at Boiled Sports has begun. And that’s fine, really, since we’re not, you know, expecting to be famous or anything. “I think if you could get a few page views…”

You know what, Terry? If you can explain to me what page views are, I’ll get on a plane, fly to Indianapolis, wash and wax your car in the parking lot of the Indianapolis Star while wearing an IU hat and a shirt that says “Terry Hutchens taught me everything about everything and he’s the awesomest.”

Also, the “it looks like your blogs get a handful of hits…” comment. Yes, that’s his second dig at nobody reading our site. And, hey, Terry – the blog is the overall THING. Boiled Sports is a BLOGsite. Each post is not a blog… it’s a POST! Welcome to 1998, you haughty jackass.

I, of course, being the prick that I am, wouldn’t stand to just let him feel smug and self-satisfied that he showed us:

Terry -- We got some feedback about you and the way you are in general and so I decided to leave a couple of fiery comments on your blog just to see if it stirred anything up... glad to see you read them.

Oh, and thanks for the dig at our page views. We're doing okay, though, since it's not our primary jobs....

Boiler Up!
J

I like to imagine Terry seeing this note and choking on his Coca-cola.

He more or less admits to it in his response:

To be honest I didn't expect you to reply either so touche. Sorry for the dig but I was feeling dug on myself so I had to resort to acheap shot as well. To be honest, again, I liked the way your site looked especially with the pictures. I wish I could get a picture of Tiger Woods' wife on my blog. Anyway, thanks for reading. I didn't post your blog comments. The one about going to a dance with Eric was too weird. But thanks again for the email response. Again, that surprised me a little bit that you respond.

Terry

Yes, Terry, we get it. You didn’t think we’d respond… mainly because we’re cowardly bloggers in our mommies basements. And it’s amazing to me that a professional journalist will even admit that he’s so easy to rattle that when he feels a comment on his blog is a “cheap shot” that he has to take one back. Yes, Terry, that’s likely to work out well for you.

So what’s the moral of this week’s lesson? I don’t know… but I do know that if you want to get under Terry’s skin, just post a comment about him being in love with Eric Gordon. You should get a personal message replete with personal insults. We also learned that Terry thinks that posts are blogs. Also, whatever you do, don’t challenge his opinions as Matt did – that’s not allowed and he doesn’t answer to you! He blogs his blog for blog-reading, blog-appreciating IU fanatics who see Terry for what he is – a giant in the world of college sports in the state of Indiana Bloomington.

The Terry Hutchens Chronicles Kick Off

We’ve been asked more than once to weigh in on Terry Hutchens, IU schill and nominal “columnist” for the Indianapolis Star. I even went after Terry on his own blog and got email from him personally…we went back and forth a bit and then our courtship came to abrupt halt. Anyway, I think what we’ll do here from time to time is check in on our friend Terry, in what I’m going to call The Terry Hutchens Chronicles.

The Terry Hutchens fun – for us, anyway – more or less begins with his haughty post mocking Purdue basketball back in August of ’06, when we landed Moore and Hummel, among others. He suggested these guys wouldn’t amount to much and, well, you can read it yourself.

Also, if you’re an IU fan, supporter or schill yourself, please save the vitriol. Yes, we’re pricks (or, at least, I am). We are entitled to call Terry out for his crap so deal with it. We’re also allowed to revel in the state of IU basketball turmoil, though to be fair, I think this feature will be less about that and more about attacking Hutchens’ poor writing, uninformed opinions and inflated self-worth.

Hope you enjoy. (Also, I know this is a long one... and you have ADD, well, bookmark it and come back. We had to start somewhere and I have no editor. So deal with it.)

----------------------------------------------------

Today’s Terry Chronicles will be a simple perusal of his a couple of blog posts over the past two weeks. As always, the actual text is in italics and my witty retorts follow. From the “Ask the Expert” feature you know he just loves doing because he is, by his self-appointment, the “expert.”

Question: With the coaching change, recruits jumping ship, current players leaving for the NBA, graduating or possibly transferring, where do you see IU realistically next season? Should we prepare for IU to have one of its worst seasons in recent memory? (John in Columbus, Ind.)

So John in Columbus wants to know if he should prepare for a bad season. What does Terry come back with?

Answer: IU's last losing season was 2004 when the Hoosiers went 14-15 overall, 7-9 in the Big Ten and tied for ninth in the conference. Before that the last losing season had been in 1970 when the Hoosiers went 7-17 and 3-11 in the Big Ten.

This is typical Terry. He likes to spit a bunch of meaningless stats at you…when he does use stats. Because, really, what does this tell us? The question is whether or not IU should prepare for a bad season. What does Terry tell us? That the Hoosiers went 14-15 in 2004. Of course, that’s when a black guy was the coach so what can you do? Right, Terry?

More of his answer:

Generally you could look at the IU schedule and say that they would have enough chances with home cupcakes in the non-conference portion of the schedule to have a chance to finish above .500 but there will be some challenging games this fall. IU is in the Maui Invitational so you can expect some tough competition there.

I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait for Chaminade to beat IU.

IU is at Kentucky.

Who many think didn’t belong in the NCAAs this year. So is this that tough a game?

There's also the Big Ten-ACC Challenge.

Point taken. We always get smoked here.

Somehow, Crean has to assemble a team that can be competitive by the time the conference season rolls around. One thing he'll have going for him is that the Big Ten still doesn't look as if it will be the strongest of conferences next season so there's always a chance in that regard.

I like this little subtle dig. If you don’t know Terry, you’d say I was being paranoid, but he dismisses Purdue basketball as a joke and a wanna-be program so with Purdue being an early favorite for next season’s Big Ten, this is a patented Hutchens backhand.

But it's going to be an uphill fight. One of the worst seasons in recent memory? With only two losing seasons in the last 38 years, it won't take much to be elevated to that status.

Annnnnd he finishes with the IU-schill flourish, reminding us all how good the program USED to be. Well-done, Terry. So it wouldn’t be hard to be a bad season since IU is like, totally awesome for, like, ever, right? Idiot.

I like this next one.

Question: What is the status of the basketball practice facility? Will it be completed by this fall? Can Coach Crean anticipate moving into his office there this year. I would think the facility would be a major selling point for future recruits. (Reid in Louisville, Ky.)

So the question is can they move into their practice facility this Fall. As in, like, 4-6 months.

Answer: I think they're behind schedule and much of that is because of things they experienced in the ground when they really got into it.

“Things they experienced in the ground.” Are we sure Terry has a journalism degree?

There was a lot of underground pipes and things that they weren't expecting plus there was a lot more limestone, too, and that has taken longer to cut through.

“There was a lot of underground pipes”? Oh? WAS there? What the frick? Seriously, I know this is a blog of sorts but come on, Terry, proofread this shit. At least give it a cursory glance. You sound like a 5th grader.

At this point, there's not even a foundation poured so it still has a ways to go.

Oh, so not even close. Without a foundation, it’ll be hard to finish in a few months. Damn that limestone.

I will say this and that's that they're working at it around the clock, putting in 18 hour days to try and get it going.

Let it be known that Terry Hutchens thinks “around the clock” is 18 hours. Maybe in Terryland, days are only 18 hours long… in addition, I imagine in Terryland, IU is always ranked #1, they’re always undefeated, there’s a neverending tap of beer under his desk and all chicks have blonde hair and DD knockers.

I haven't heard the latest as to when they hope to get the first phase done.

Thanks for telling us absolutely nothing, Terry. Except that the ground is hard and they’re working around your 18-hour clock, yet haven’t been able to pour a foundation yet. Must be union workers.

This answer gets even better though as Terry does another Terryism, which is to name-drop.

I will say this and that's that I asked Tom Crean about it in an interview on Wednesday and he's coming from a place that had one of the best practice facilities in the country, and he said he's very impressed with what this one is going to look like. He said he wouldn't have changed a thing.

Since there isn’t a foundation yet, I wonder how Tom can be so sure.

He said when he has made recruiting calls, he has walked by the site and held up the phone so that people could hear the construction going on.

That’s awesome. I really hope Tom Crean is calling recruits and then holding up his cell phone at the construction site. I hope foul-mouthed construction workers are what’s being transmitted into his phone.

“Hey, man, what the f-ck? Why don’t we have a foundation poured yet?”
“I don’t know man. Looks like limestone.”
“But limestone isn’t hard. It breaks apart like chalk.”
“Oh. Well, I told that burly reporter that’s what the problem was.”
“Oh, no problem… he thinks there’s only 18 hours in a day so that’ll keep him busy.”

He said he's very excited about what that will do in terms of helping him bring top level talent to Indiana.

I also like that Terry used “he said” three sentences in a row. Solid writing, Terry.

Another question for the "expert":

Question: You may remember we've communicated before as I made the comments on 'patterns' of Kelvin Sampson.

This is like when a guy calls a radio call-in show and expects the host to remember him from a book-signing two years ago. Get a life, dude.

As I watch Tom Crean in the early stages of his career at IU, there's one thing that stands out -- He "gets it".

Dude, he’s been there like a week.

He gets the thing that Mike Davis never understood and Kelvin Sampson didn't care about.

Being white?

He gets the fact that IU basketball is more than simply signing big name players, winning games. and going to the NCAA tournament.

Ummmm, it’s about signing guys who leave after one year, winning some games, getting on probation and losing in the first round? No? Oh, okay.

He gets the fact that IU basketball is a reflection of the entire university and indeed the entire state. He gets the fact that everything he does either enhances or detracts from the reputation of all of the above. He doesn't just understand it, he has embraced it. Us IU fans in all likelihood will have to suffer through one or possibly two mediocre seasons as Coach Crean builds his program. But that's exactly what he'll do -- build a program rather than simply trying to put players on the floor to win games. I have every confidence that, at least in the beginning, he'll be able to recruit the Indiana players that haven't come to IU for the last ten years. Of course, the proof is in the pudding, but we have to like the fact that Coach Crean appears to 'get it' where the two before him did not. (Dan in Carmel, Ind.)

Okay, I know this is about bashing Terry Hutchens but seriously, Dan from Carmel. Settle down. IU is not some holy bastion of right-ness where it’s about “more than winning.” Stop acting like winning isn’t enough at IU; you also have to cure cancer at halftime. It’s a fricking basketball program that has been mediocre in both stature and results for a long time now. I can’t stand it when people make comments like this:

He gets the fact that IU basketball is more than simply signing big name players, winning games. and going to the NCAA tournament. He gets the fact that IU basketball is a reflection of the entire university and indeed the entire state. He gets the fact that everything he does either enhances or detracts from the reputation of all of the above.

Yes, if Tom Crean farts in church, it detracts from the entire program, the university, the state of Indiana, humankind, and Earth. Not necessarily in that order.

Let’s get to Terry’s answer, though.

Answer: I'll agree that at least in terms of first impressions, Tom Crean has made a good one. Now again, as refreshing as all of that may be, the unfortunate thing that has happened at IU over the last few years is that Indiana fans have gotten to where they're afraid to trust anyone because of that trust getting misplaced.

Why are we talking about IU coach’s relationship with the fans like a jilted lover?

What I like the most about Tom Crean right now is that you can tell he's wants to be here.

Here at Boiled Sports, what we like most is that he has a forehead you could show a movie on.

I'm not saying that Mike Davis and Kelvin Sampson didn't because I know they did, but Crean is just treating it all a little bit different. With Crean, you just know that he's working every minute of every day to get this program back to where it hopes to one day be.

As opposed to those lazy black guys, who only worked some days. Right, IU?

Terry goes on with his answer but it’s clichéd crap about “doing it the right way” and “following the rules,” etc.

-----------------------------------------------

A week before the above column, Terry wrote about his boyfriend Eric Gordon. For those of you who don’t know, Terry Hutchens wants to wear Eric Gordon’s letterman’s jacket and take him to the Sadie Hawkins dance. It’s kind of brutal. He angerly defended Gordon and his antagonistic family after the Illinois game and he refused to post my comments when I disagreed with that blog post. That’s when he emailed me directly (again, we’ll get to that).

Anyway, on April 7, he talked about Eric Gordon’s presser. He talks about how Crean showed up at the press conference and how it was such a selfless thing to do. How Crean hasn’t once tried to talk Gordon into staying (okay, decide on your own whether to believe this or not – I honestly don’t know whether to call bullsh-t on it or not), etc. And then he talks about Crean coming to this press conference simply to be more supportive.

And then it gets silly:

It would be one thing if Gordon's press conference had been held in the press room at Assembly Hall, and Crean simply had to walk down the ramp and down the stairs to be supportive. But the press conference was held at the Jewish Community Center on the Northwest side of Indianapolis, in the neighborhood where Gordon grew up. No, this wasn't a small undertaking. Door to door for Crean was just about 70 miles. With traffic, it was about an hour and 20 minutes to get there.

Terry, are you SERIOUSLY acting like it was a big deal for Tom Crean to travel 70 miles to be a good guy? You’ll notice in Terry’s writing that he always has to point out mileages and how much time in a car everything requires. With traffic it was 80 minutes! What a guy!

Look, Tom Crean’s getting paid a lot of money to coach IU. He could get a car service and I don’t think it’d dent his wallet.

But Crean thought it was important. Like he did the day he was introduced in Bloomington, Crean shook a lot of hands and signed a lot of autographs but he made certain that he wasn't stealing Gordon's thunder or spotlight in any way. When the 20-25 members of the media made it clear they wanted to do an interview with the new IU coach, Crean suggested the interview take place out in the hallway where it wouldn't be any distraction to Gordon's autograph-signing session.

Except for the distraction of two dozen reporters leaving the room and clogging the hallway.

I think Crean earned some approval points today. Personally, I thought it was a classy thing to do. Crean didn't have to show his support. He's got enough things on his plate right now, and logging 140 miles to support a player that will never play a minute for him may have not been a great use of his time.

Seriously, Tom. You could be holding your phone up for people to hear the progress on the new practice facility. And then watch the recruits line up!

Okay, that’s enough Terry-bashing for one post. In fact, this is way too much. But it’ll give you something to read for a while. Print it out, take it to the pooper.