The Only Thing That Could Make This Bowl Any Better Would Be If Our Team Couldn't Close The Deal!

You know what would be cool, random fan of the other team I am buddies with? If this bowl game was really close but our team couldn't close the deal and thus we got to see shi-ty, college-rules overtime!

High five!

It turns out that Buffalo Wild Wings will be sponsoring a bowl game out in the Arizona desert, formerly known as the Insight Bowl. And since it typically features a Big Ten team, there's chance that we will be subjected to our favorite program being in a bowl game brought to you by an outfit that thinks this is how being a fan of competitive sports works.

We've bitched about this before -- both boilerdowd and I loathe BWW's commercials, because they appear to be written by our mothers.....that is: "Sports -- yay!"

We will often text each other randomly during games and just say, "You know what would make this game even better? A janitor controlling sprinklers."

Well, it turns out we have a kindred spirit in the form of MGoBlog's Brian Cook:

I hope other people are driven as insane by the idea people would go to a sports bar and cheer for a tie, or that someone could be watching the Detroit Randoms try a last-ditch Hail Mary down a touchdown and say "the only thing that could make this better is… OVERTIME" instead of "the only thing that could make this better is winning 68-0 and being at a place where the food comes on, you know, plates." I hate the fake BWW people so, so much. 

 Thank you, Brian.

Thursday Gumbo Featuring UND Slapping, Penis Pulling, And Other Fun

It's Thursday. I don't know what that has to do with anything, but let's do a bit of a link dump of what we're reading lately...

No, Manatee, You're Just Wrong

You know how sometimes we like to tear apart stupid Notre Dame crap? And how we really don't like Fat Charlie?

Well, MGoBlog has a simply wonderful, wonderful, wonderful-like-Christmas-morning-featuring-a-Red-Ryder-BB-gun, evisceration of the Notre Dame whining from the UND-UM game. Please read it. You won't be disappointed.

How Closely Do You Watch The Big Ten Commercials?

I'll admit it, Paterno is the best part of the "recruiting" ad. And yes, this headline from Black Shoe Diaries is awesome for those paying attention. Nicely done.

And You Thought Jay Leno Interviewing Kanye Was Stilted

Our friend T-Mill from Hammer and Rails is going to great efforts to make his podcast good (unlike us, who basically subject you to a phone call we probably have a few times a week). He even went out and found a Northern Illinois blogger to have on his podcast. The guy turned out to sound a bit like me... if I had eaten a bucket of quaaludes and then smoked a joint like the one in Revenge of the Nerds Part II. Listen as poor T-Mill asks a question and gets, "Yeah" in response. It's kind of awesome.

Yet Bob Knight Is Healthy As An Ox

Whether you liked Miles Brand or not, as T-Mill pointed out on his site, the guy should get a moment of your thoughts/prayers as he shuffles off this mortal coil at age 67. He did finally drop the ax on Bob Knight at IU. Also, cancer sucks.

J Money Not Only Awesome Boilermaker in Houston

When you think of my awesomeness, you of course realize only a state the size of Texas can contain it. Which is why it's amazing that both me and Kevin Sumlin fit here. Sumlin was a linebacker at Purdue in the '80s and then coached under Tiller for a while, and now he's quickly resurrecting a dormant Houston football program, who knocked off Okie State last weekend. (When can we start talking about the Big 12 the way others talk about the Big 10?)

Northern Illnois Bloggers Very Creative

Yes, they trotted out the old "Purdon't" joke in their preview of the game this weekend. Hey, fellas, why don't they make the whole plane out of the black box material? Amirite?? I just flew in from Northern Illinois, and boy are my arms tired! (Okay, okay, just kidding... we all know airplanes don't go anywhere near UNI.)

They also mentioned Danny Hope getting away from "strict basketball on grass" (again, a term not really used by anyone who knows anything about Purdue football since about 1999).

Another point which I suppose might have merit, but none of us think so:

Even though their coaches and everybody is denying this fully, you have to think that this team will either be hungover from their trip to Eugene, OR or be looking ahead. Or both.

You have to think? Or you hope?

And then the grand finale, their prediction. I'll let you enjoy:

I haven't had much time to look at what Purdue has been able to do, but I've been fairly impressed both offensively and defensively. I just feel like NIU has proved a little bit more on the defensive side of the ball, while still maintaining their strong offensive gameplan. Northern Illinois will try to rush the ball all game long against the 'makers, hopefully resulting in rest for our defense and making sure that the dangerous offense for Purdue is on the sidelines more often than not. We have to control the clock and not make mistakes such as turnovers or giving up the big pay on defense. And put somebody, anybody on Ralph Bolden at all times. That being said...

Huskies 35, Boilermakers 26

It all sounds so simple. And don't forget, they almost beat Big Ten teams all the time.

UM Panties Remain Bunched, Cause Strange Justifications

We found it interesting that the write-ups from several prominent and respected (usually, even by us) Michigan sites were so up-in-arms over the incident in Mackey Arena on Saturday. The incident, which you know unless you accidentally navigated in here while doing a Google search on Boiled Crawfish or something (and if so, welcome), was the one in which Manny Harris of Michigan put his elbow into Chris Kramer's nose and was then ejected from the game.

First, let's take a look at some of the foot-stomping going on out there in the 'sphere:

From the UM Rivals board:

Watch the clip and tell me: did Manny even make contact with Kramer's face? I don't think he did. I think Kramer flopped and broke his nose when he fell on the floor.

Yes, I'm sure that's what happened. Kramer's face never hit the floor. Come on. Look at it frame by frame.

From Maize n Brew:

"Unfortunately, Purdue's Kramer was checking Harris from approximately 1 inch away with his face very closely. So when Harris swung through, his elbow caught Kramer in the nose (who quickly went to the floor) and what transpired next could only be aptly described as a sham of officiating."

Who "quickly went to the floor"? Is this implying Kramer was acting? He actually lost consciousness. So yeah, what a flopper. Let's move along.

MnB then goes on to quote from the rule book, as do other sites, but they of course pull the parts that support their boy.

Do you really want to use the rulebook? Because so can we. Many of the UM sites are saying sure he deserved a flagrant, but since he didn't MEAN to hurt Kramer, he shouldn't have been ejected. Unfortunately, just like not knowing how fast you're going isn't an excuse to get out of a speeding ticket, not "meaning" to hurt someone is no reason not to be penalized. Let me share a subsection of Rule 10, Article 13 with you:

Rule 10, Article 13, sub e, sub-sub 2: Two free throws [are awarded] for an intentional personal or flagrant personal foul and the ball awarded at a designated spot nearest to where the foul occurred.

Any flagrant personal foul shall result in ejection of the offender.

Read that last line again. Not to pick on anyone in particular, but Michigan Sports Center makes the case like this:

This was a ridiculous call simply because Harris didn't intentionally hit Kramer. I can't stress that enough. It was an accident.

Once it was determined that it was a flagrant personal foul, Manny was done. It's not debatable. And it doesn't matter if he really is a nice guy and didn't mean to do it. He did it and so he's guilty.

What's really disappointing was the normally level-headed MGoBlog's take, which was this:

"It's one thing to lose. It's another thing to lose partially, largely, or entirely because of the incompetence of a referee.... [It was] a foul and was adjudged one until such point as Scrappy Heady IQ Head For The Scrappy Eckstein started gushing blood out of his nose and the Purdue crowd cried out, at which point it was cause to boot Manny Harris. From there Michigan imploded."

A few things... one, we're not arguing that the Big Ten officials are awful and incompetent and stealing money from the NCAA. They miss calls both ways. But these digs at Kramer as though he embelleshed this are just ridiculous. He didn't "gush blood" for effect. And it wasn't the crowd being angry that got Manny booted -- it was a couple of other things...

As already detailed, no matter how sweet a guy Manny Harris is, it was a flagrant foul. And a flagrant foul -- especially one causing injury -- is cause for ejection. Even if Manny teaches disabled children how to walk again and has singing voice that makes doves appear. It's irrelevant.

And, yes, Zack Novak's blatant elbow in the previous game against OSU does affect things. Sorry, boys, but your team is being looked at more closely now. You have guys throwing elbows and getting suspended and so when another elbow happens in the very next game you simply cannot act outraged that people begin to ask questions.

One of the other popular things today is to take rips at Jay Bilas' comments on ESPN that night. He said Belein has to "get his team under control." And this is true. Whether or not you think Manny's elbow was intentional, it's now a pattern. And who is responsible? The coach. None of us here think he's coaching them to elbow guys. But both incidents occurred when his players were very frustrated -- one in a blowout loss (Novak) and the other when their leading scorer was getting worked by Kramer.

And what about the other comments made by guys more respected that Bilas? How about Bob Knight pointing out that if the defender gets up on you, that's his space. You do not have the right to swing your elbows into his nose. That is a flagrant offensive foul.

Michigan fans have every right to be bothered by this situation. But to toss the rulebook around and act as though it's silly to eject a guy who drew blood by committing a textbook flagrant foul -- especially in light of recent elbowing fouls on the same team -- is just being a little bit short-sighted. We thought maybe everybody just needed to calm down after a disappointing loss and would then come to their senses. Guess not, though.

What enraged most of the Mackey crowd more than the play, though, was that after the decision was made, Belien's repeated physical turning around of the official to continue arguing with him. Matt Painter gets a technical foul at the end of the first half because he argued with the officials over a non-call when Robbie Hummel gets mugged, yet John Belein can assault the referees at his leisure and until he's done with his dissertation. We were there and, trust me, that's what almost caused the riot.

When Kramer got the elbow to the face, we didn't actually think Manny should be ejected. We were actually pissed at the officials at that point. As Boilerdowd said to me, "You have two teams that play pressure defense in each other's faces and you call a total of ten team fouls in the first half. This is what happens."

Was this like someone stepping on another player's head or like Zack Novak's elbow in the previous game? Absolutely, unequivocally, not.

Was it a flagrant foul that the rulebook says you get ejected for?

Yes, it was.

BS Interview Series -- Brian from MGoBlog

I know you thought this would be yet another series that never got off the ground but, ha! You were wrong! We may be slack-asses but, hey, we're your kind of slack-asses, right? That's why you keep coming back.

So today we're sharing the second of our "Better Know A Blogger" series, featuring the Big Ten blogger network. If you're not aware of the Michigan blog, MGoBlog, well, you just haven't been paying attention. Even OSU fans and blogs respect the work Brian does there and if you spend some time on his site you realize just how much work he must put into it. I asked him if he could share some time with us and he graciously agreed. And I didn't even have to put out.

Enjoy.

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Boiled Sports: Why "MGoBlog"?

Brian, MGoBlog: “MGoBlue” is a common thing to see on bumper stickers or posters or any sort of general what-have-you in the Michigan fan community. The official site is “MGoBlue.com.” It just seemed like a natural decision. I didn't realize it at the time, but it was an inspired choice. It's short, easy to remember, and super-easy to google. I now know why Web 2.0 startups invariably make up a word like “frozzbatozz!”

BS: “Upon Further Review” is brilliant for the true UM football junkie. How long does a “UFR” session take you? And is it your favorite ongoing feature? If not, what is?

B, MGB: I've never really timed it but on the order of several hours, depending on the importance of the game. I don't put much effort into figuring out what goes on in the fourth quarter of the EMU game. It don't know if it's my favorite ongoing feature – game columns are much more fun to write – but it's the most important. Without it I'm just a guy on the internet; with it I'm a guy on the internet who knows more than you about Michigan football.

BS: When you think of Purdue athletics, what do you think of?

B, MGB: Severe underperformance against Michigan, mostly. There have been some close games in the series, but it seems more often than not I'm way more nervous going into the Purdue game than the game itself warrants. Dropped passes, missed field goals, self-destruction of all kinds. It always seems like Purdue is this close to breaking through, but they never do. [Sniffle. We know. -- ed.] Also: life insurance.

BS: As a fan, would you rather see UM go 7-5 and go to a mediocre bowl but beat Ohio State to ruin a perfect season…OR… go 11-1, play in a Jan 1 bowl game but lose that one game to the Buckeyes?

B, MGB: 11-1. Is this seriously a question?

[At this point, I said, "Yes, it's really a question...bitch," then took a swing at him. Brian, to my surprise and ultimate detriment, turns out to be a fesity fighter. After thoroughly bloodying me, he pulled my face out of the urinal he was submerging me in and said, "Okay, NOW, do you want to continue the interview?"]

[Ed. note: The above paragraph is not true.]

BS: In a paragraph or two, sum up Michigan fans feelings, expectations and hopes going into the RichRod era, specifically for 2008.

B, MGB: In 2008? Most feel apprehensive, expect mediocrity, and hope to extend Michigan's nation-best bowl streak. Three returning starters on offense and one bullet each at a number of key positions, mostly QB and the offensive line, means Michigan is an injury or two away from mass chaos.

But Penn State manages to cobble together Alamo Bowl or better season with only the faintest tinge of an offense, and Rich Rodriguez is not Charlie Weis... those expecting a real soul-wrencher a la Notre Dame last year will be disappointed.

BS: Many of us know you shut the site down and had pink colors and kittens up after the Appalachian State game. Will that sting ever go away? Or has it already?

B, MGB: The shutdown was just to turn the comments off. Anyone who has The Horror happen to them and then does anything but not think about football for a few days (or months) needs help; if one person said “f-ck it, let's go bowling” because of it, mission accomplished. The kittens were just an attempt to be funny, because it was either that or spittle, and who needs spittle at a time like that?

But that's pretty much faded. Every coach associated with the loss is gone. It's a new era, a clean break, and that game may have saved us the specter of Mike Debord as the head coach. If Rodriguez pans out, Michigan fans may actually look back on that day as a positive.

BS: Best moment for you personally as a Wolverines fan? Worst moment for you as a Wolverines fan?

B, MGB: Best: walking on the field after the Ohio State game in 1997. Worst: the Horror.

BS: Do you have a college program other than your true love that you kind of have a guilty pleasure for? For example, despite all the haters, do you have a soft spot for Florida football or North Carolina basketball or something like that?

B, MGB: No, I think that sort of thing is reserved for fans of non alpha-dog teams. I've already got the team that can win big and has to win big for me to be happy. Picking another one would be like those guys who were Laker and Yankee fans growing up.

I have proof I'm not that person: when I finally got fed up with the Red Wings due to a combination of excessive payroll, horrible fans (quietest group of corporate lawyers in the NHL) and their constant importing of people I loathed (Chelios was the last straw), I went searching for another team and struck upon the Edmonton Oilers, then a hopeless small-market team getting killed by the Candian dollar and never going anywhere. The US dollars collapse and the CBA have evened things out, but at the time I was signing up for unending pain. This is why I can't get into the EPL, too. I won't pick one of the Big Four, and picking anyone else is pointless.

I do have some secret favorites, but they vary by situation. I think I'm going to be pulling for Georgia Tech over the next few years because I'm a sucker for an oddball system (and it's a dork school). I hated Nebraska when they were unstoppable but now that they're adrift, I feel for their excellent fans. If they go back to the option I will pull for them. And, ironically, I like West Virginia. The team has no talent but plays fast as hell and wins. It had Owen Schmitt on it. And the state is tiny and full of loons who sing 'Country Roads' unironically after games and care so much they'll kill you... what's not to love? They even have nice colors.

BS: In your opinion did Lloyd Carr stay too long? How will he be remembered by the UM faithful?

B, MGB: Carr obviously held on a year or three too long, but I think most Michigan fans will remember him fondly. Despite the disappointing finish to his career, he did have a national title and Michigan had something like the 7th best record in college football over his tenure. His overall record versus OSU was 6-7... not exactly Cooper.

Moreover, I think he just fit with the fanbase. He was cranky but erudite and passionate about college football. He railed against the increasing corporatization of the game. He read serious books. And when Bo died he gave a speech that I'll remember for a long time. I'll always want Michigan to win no matter who the coach is, but I wanted Lloyd to win. That ain't gonna happen with Rodriguez.

BS: Most of those of us who write one of these blogsites have a steady list of sites they visit every morning. What are some favorite blogs of yours to read? List as many or as few as you’d like.

B, MGB: The usual: Sunday Morning Quarterback, EDSBS, Black Heart Gold Pants. Eleven Warriors and Our Honor Defend are the best OSU blogs; Mvictors, Michigan Sports Center, UMHoops, Varsity Blue, and the Blog That Yost Built are go-to Michigan blogs. Hey Jenny Slater, Rocky Top Talk, Burnt Orange Nation... uh... Inside The Hall and Spartans Weblog, PJS and Gopher Nation, Garnet and Black Attack, the Joe Cribbs Car Wash, Get The Picture, Troy Nunes Is An Absolute Magician... there are literally too many to name. And I have to pour some out for dead homies Big Ten Wonk and RBUAS.

Also, a confession: I read Go Fug Yourself.

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Previous subjects of the BS Interview Series:

Lake the Posts